FIRST THERE WAS LILITH, or: WHAT THE FUCK WAS ADAM THINKING?

Everyone knows the official story: God created the heavens and earth and finally got around to creating Adam in His own image, as well as creating all the beasts of the wild. After it became clear that Adam wasn't necessarily down with the whole wildlife thing God decided to steal a rib from him and finally got around to creating a more compatible mate for him to kick around Eden with.

We all know how that turned out.

What most people don't know, at least according to some ancient Jewish texts and writings, is that before Eve entered the picture Adam had a previous wife: Lilith. If her name is known at all by most people it is for the annual women's themed concerts of Lilith Fair- but even then most people wouldn't recognize the genesis of the name.

Now according to the stories, Lilith was not created from Adam's rib, but rather she was created in the same way and at the same time as Adam, thus making her his equal in every way. Big mistake on God's part. It seems that, in terms of fucking and pretty much everything else, Adam believed that Lilith existed for his own amusement, and that the only acceptable position for such activities was missionary, with Adam on top and Lilith taking the submissive position. What a pathetic, unimaginative dick.

Lilith was not amused. As Adam's equal, she believed that she had every right to make Adam assume the position and let her have her way with him, as her pleasure was just as important as his (I am not making any of this shit up, you just won't read about it in the King James Bible though). She also believed that in all matters Adam and her should be equals, and that as such, she wasn't about to take any shit from him.

To make a long story short: Lilith pretty much bailed on Adam after it became clear that his only interest in her was as his own personal blow-up doll. Now God, being the supreme being, got a bit pissed at Lilith and sent a couple of hoods after her to return her to Eden, which she was having none of. She preferred to wander the earth as an exile from Eden, seeking her own pleasure and paying whatever price there was to be paid.

History hasn't been kind to Lilith: she has been portrayed as a temptress who leads men astray and as a destroyer of children. Since history is pretty much written by men, this is unsurprising. But what was her sin really? To expect the same pleasure and enjoyment and respect that Adam thought was his right doesn't seem like an egregious offense. I am willing to bet that if Adam had a bit more imagination that he and Lilith probably would still be in Eden, screwing like rabbits and laying in fields of clover.

I wonder what ran through Adam's head later in life, after being expelled from the Garden and fathering a fucked up brood of children with his nice submissive wife. Did he ever look back and wonder how things would have been if he had only been willing to accept Lilith as his equal. Did he ever look over at Eve in the middle of the night and think: I gave up Eden for this? Probably not. He was probably like so many other people who don't have the capacity to appreciate what they truly have, and it would never occur to him that, in comparison, Eve would never be able to measure up to Lilith.

The woman I love has a name, but I won't use it here. I will just call her Lilith, and I revel in the fact that she is more than my equal in every way. I happily submit to her every desire, and Eden exists wherever she and I happen to be. The fact that her Adam doesn't seem to appreciate her just pisses me off no end. He lives in a paradise with an angel and doesn't seem to have a fucking clue as to how rare a thing this truly is, while I would give anything to tend to and nurture her Garden in any way she would let me.

Adam was a clueless tool.

The woman I love has a name, but here I will call her Lilith. She is my temptress, she haunts my dreams and lingers in every corridor of my mind, and my senses reel whenever I am with her. I would never do anything to chase her from this garden, for any reason, and I am honored and humbled by her love and affection.

I love you Lilith.